12 Comments
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Bryn Williams's avatar

Particularly relevant to those of us who live our lives in the U.K.

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Flash Light / Suzanne Miller's avatar

I’ve never seen this issue so well articulated and I’m looking forward to more! I grew up with 5 siblings in a tiny house outside Philly. My dad was a welder, my mom a waitress. Neither graduated from high school. There was never an expectation that any of us would rise above. Long story short, I eventually graduated from Yale Law School and settled with my two children in Connecticut. Needless to say there was some culture shock to navigate in so many ways! 🙏

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Kristy Tillman's avatar

Thank you so much for this comment Suzanne. Are you on twitter by chance?

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Flash Light / Suzanne Miller's avatar

I’m not. 😕

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Vidhika Bansal's avatar

Love this piece Kristy. So excited that you've coined a much-needed term for this somewhat hard-to-articulate experience, and that you're going to keep writing on this topic. It's so important and resonant. Honored to have helped shape the essay a bit, and now that it's live, I'll be sharing it with some friends who will surely relate!

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Amy's avatar
Oct 31Edited

Thank you for sharing. I think sometimes this phenomenon is not even chiefly about finances. My family wanted me to get an education, but when I did, I don't think they were all that pleased with the person I became. The money is kind of secondary. It's mostly about the perception that youve left the group you were raised in -- whatever that looks like.

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Kristy Tillman's avatar

Amy you are spot on. I have been doing interviews with self identified folks that fall into this camp to build out some more threads and I have seen this idea repeatedly. I definitely plan to tack what it means to "leave the group".

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Michael Ritoch's avatar

Beautifully written, Kristy. I think a good percentage of America are straddlers. I know my parents were.

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Shuba Swaminathan's avatar

An incredibly familiar narrative through multiple lenses besides class to a first generation American like me. Life is lived in parallel universes, where the immersion in each is so deep that the other universe ceases to exist for the moment.

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Kristy Tillman's avatar

This is really poetically put Shuba!

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Jacek Andrzejewski's avatar

I never heard that name, but it's very relatable. I am a Straddler, just an European one. I wonder if that makes experience somehow different.

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Kristy Tillman's avatar

I have interviewed a few folks from the UK, I hope to talk to other Europeans to expand my thinking on how relatable the concept is.

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